“Realizing how many situations lay on the path behind me, orchestrated for the sole purpose of breaking my soul…brought a sense of gratitude I’ve never felt before.“

“…this detached approach to life reminded me that there hasn’t been much growth in my mentality since my days of discarding my own seeds. I have just replaced that sacrifice of life with another version.”

“I love giving unsolicited advice.”

“Having this understanding gives me insight on why it feels like my ‘mother’ is sabotaging my efforts to start this conversation. If we were to go to counseling, her parenting style would eventually be the topic of conversation.”

“Accepting what is, is a fairly new adjustment technique of mine. The act allows me to let go of my heightened false sense of control and it shifts my focus to the present moment.”

“Fear has been the perfect reinforcer when my family is attempting to get me to bend to their will. I’ve always been the worrier of my family and to pacify my ‘what if’ fears…I overextend myself…at the expense of myself.”

“Then… my toxicity started demanding attention and my thoughts shifted to the envy I felt towards the trees on the trail. They’ll never know what it feels like for another tree to judge its bark…and the intrusion of that thought had me in a chokehold.”

“…the majority of our society has been conditioned to share the same socially accepted viewpoints of what ‘normal’ behavior is. I enjoy being in the minority because I know ‘normal’ is an ideal…that no one has attained.”

“You’re okay. Breathe. I know how this feels but I promise you are safe. I don’t even know what we are safe from but I know in this moment we have everything we need. Just stay here.”

“I’m the creator of many motion pictures…that all live in my mind. I’m the main character in all these films and my cast is composed of the same archetypes…but the humans that these personas show up in change regularly.“

“It takes no time for me to learn the behavioral patterns of others…but it’s taken me eons to figure out that my own tendency to gaslight is always strongest after a perceived trigger.“

“Appearing to be more sought after then you are creates a certain level of desirability which makes a person who doesn’t feel seen…feel a certain sense of importance.”

“One of my favorite things to do on those lazy days was watch Judge Judy. Her style of judgement resonates with me because she’s able to dress her bare naked truth with humor.“

“Growing up, I had a hand full of extremely detailed diaries…but my ‘mother’ used to put things in storage and forget they existed. So all memories of my childhood are gone. ”

“Saying these last two weeks have been an emotionally draining freak show is an enormous understatement.”

“Organized religion is what my siblings and I were raised on, but as I got older I started to realize how much of a crutch that form of believing is for those who prefer to sit back and wait for someone else to solve their issues.”