“ if the ‘balance bill’ for telling an unflattering truth about someone is having someone else discover an unflattering truth about me…I’d take that over biting my tongue, IF the truth I’m speaking is negatively affecting me or someone I love. The death of my pride is just par for the course.”

““Friendship” is a fantasy unless it is a relationship you have with self. Because everyone is walking around with some kind of unhealed trauma. If you engage with another human soul for long enough…at some point your existence will trigger an unflattering emotion within them.”

“I’ve been able to water down how I view my meanness though because I found sovereignty in the fact that my inner demon never appears unless provoked. But if my perspective is polluted…provocation is inevitable. So no matter how I try to dress my behavior up…I’m guilty of the same thing I convict my ‘mother’ and her minions of.”

“The sense of entitlement that this new generation of adult children have, as a result of the misguidance from the older adult children who raised them, is excruciatingly infuriating. But because I’m already at a disadvantage with having the diagnosis of ‘bipolar’…I have to carefully contain the rage flowing through my body in order to articulate the fury I feel right now.”

“I’m sure everyone reading is aware, at this point, that over the last four years the most common insult my ‘family’ has used against me is in regards to my mental health ‘issues’. I’ve been called “crazy”, “schizophrenic”, “delusional”, “paranoid” and a “loser” throughout my reign in the group chat(s) by the same people who then turned around and told me how concerned they were for my decision not to “get help”.”

“…God shows us who is for and against us before we get betrayed. If you see the slightest hint of someone showing signs that they will use a lie to stomp your light out the first chance they get…exit stage left. Not doing so will only put you in an energetically draining scenario that you may not recover from.”

“Kendrick doesn’t fit in the circle so he squared up. “Tough tit-taye”. The fact that Cole tried to place him there speaks more to his pride needing to be in the same sentence as someone whose greatness he recognizes. The fact that Kdot distanced himself speaks more to his understanding that we should be measuring ourselves against ourselves..not against who’s standing next to us.

“…today…I was reminded why Cole’s apology was necessary. I fully support his decision to apologize because for anyone that’s gone through the process of a spiritual awakening…the slightest separation from the transcendental energy you’ve fought so hard to align with...feels like sleep walking in the sunken place. ”

“After I dove into my feelings, I realized that this is how my rants always start. It’s like an energetic transfer of emotions takes place and I always end up feeling all the negatives while the people who handed me their toxicity walk off with my peace.”

“Unpopular Opinion: None of us are here for the sole purpose of saving our own soul. If we are privileged enough to obtain work wisdom..we have an obligation to share it because it may fall on the ears of someone who needs to know how to navigate a similar occupation.”

“I won’t pretend that there haven’t been days on this journey that I decided my presence here was no longer needed. But even in those moments…I was still present enough to know that taking myself out of this game only gives the players banking on my demise a win. I simply can not crown my opponents.”

“I was born to be an aunt. Some women were born possessing the patience of a million saints and live to see themselves in their carbon copied creations. Others know they have no parental instincts but still roll the dice on parenthood for one reason or another. I check none of those boxes. The idea of being a mother has never appealed to me…ever.“

“Most of this anger is coming from the fact that I don’t have a family anymore. And even though I realize my past inability to control my anger played a part in the deterioration of my relationship with my bloodline…I can’t reconcile why no one will acknowledge that I didn’t start out angry.”

“I was first introduced to the term ‘Chosen One’ by my twin a few years ago. She brought the words to my attention while telling me…and the group chat…how sorry she was for that being something I’d never be. I had no idea this term was a title people claimed outside of movies prior to her mentioning it. And to this day she refuses to explain what she meant by her statement.”

“I still embody the ability to deceive on occasion so I can’t say I don’t empathize with the Slanderous Sanderson's. Some truths I fear acknowledging because they show a version of myself that I don’t like. Maybe my family has this same fear and their solution is to scapegoat me in order to feel more likeable.”

“I’ve been doing my best to temper my reactions to their tiny triggers because that allows me to accumulate sane points for when I eventually decide to call out their insane behavior. Being this mENtaLLy stAbLE is taking a lot out of me.”

“The most consistent red flag I ignored in my past ‘delusionist’ state was a man’s inability to respect my boundaries. This is clearly a running theme in my life…but this behavior isn’t appearing out of the blue. I violate the boundaries of others on a pretty consistent basis and most times I give little to no regard for my overstep.”

“The pizza delivery position I had to rush to get so my car wouldn’t be repossessed, served as God’s humble hummus after my inability to doppelgang my previous Corporate position. It took years of me bouncing through temporary jobs until I found my current position. That outcome may have been different if I had learned how to respect a person’s status…even when their soul doesn’t feel right. Oh well my guy.”

“And they both refuse to acknowledge how my ability to successfully juggle THEIR RESPONSIBILITES…goes against everything they’ve claimed about me their entire life. No apologies, no acknowledgement that they took me through what they PURPOSEFULLY took me through. Nothing but hands out, extended in my “bipolar” direction.“