Hidden features…
I like when things appear to be exactly what they are. Because it takes the guesswork out of figuring out what I’m not seeing. But life reveals our reality in layers. So we have to work through one…to access the next. It took me waking up from my victimhood, to start building towards a reality that I actually want. Which revealed the sleeper build that was hiding beneath all the layers of lunacy...that I was using as a crutch to hide my potential. My vulnerability initiated this strip tease...that’s now showing the muscles my mentality developed, from all the shadow work I’ve been putting in. And…I love what I see.
It’s crazy how I made the decision to heal one day…and fully expected to wake up healed the next. But my ego needed to believe it was that easy. Because my pride didn’t want to put in all the work that my subconscious knew was coming. So I didn’t want to grasp the concept of the journey, because I didn’t want to accept that healing takes just as long as whatever hurt we experienced...that led to our need for it. And my trauma will more than likely take ‘a long periolodically time’ to work through…since that’s how long I stayed in it…dressing it up as something that it wasn’t.
The trauma bonds I built during that time have honestly helped me identify strengths I didn’t even know I possessed. And I only figured out I had them, when using them became a requirement…in order to leave behind the thought processes that kept me bound. I fought against leaving a lot of people in the past…for a long time. Since bonds like these can convince you that the shared toxicity will eventually heal itself. But that thought process kept me stuck in a psychotic sedation and…it wasn’t logical. Because it’s impossible to heal in the same environment that’s making you sick. So distancing myself from my comfort zones was the first step…to start the process of stripping away belief systems…that were keeping me crazy.
Love,
Choosy
