SoftSpot

“I feel like it’s time for me to come clean about my addiction…to (mis)matching energy. I usually pretend I’m giving back what I get but if I’m bothered…I always look for ways to overgive. Because that’s the only way I feel like I break even. In the past, I’ve purposely said hurtful things…in order to hit the softest spot of my target because my goal is always to walk away with a win…even when I feel like I lost. And before now, I’ve been able to gaslight my way around my guilt. But it hit me earlier, while I was taking my anger out on my kettlebell. Now, I’m left with a need to hold myself accountable for trying to inflict more hurt than I was feeling. If I don’t, I’ll set myself up to repeat history and…there’s nothing back there that I want.”